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Bookreview! Land of the painted caves by J.M. Auel

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The story continues the saga about Ayla wand her life in the stoneage. This book is mainly a story of how she becomes a shaman, spiritual leader and her journey to see the cave paintings in the area around where she lives.

The book is slow. It spends 500 pages repeating and re-hashing itself and the previous 5 books.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s interesting. But i need to admit to myself that certain passages, it does get boring. I was willing the story foreward and i was rooting for the characters to jump off the page as they have in the previous book but they only in brief glimpses come alive!
There are too many characters involved and some of the issues that Ayla had been building up to for 5 books does not come to any resolution. i mean, where is Durc, the child she had to leave behind. Where are te solutions to the Clan/the Others-conflict and why doesn’t Jondalar act how he’s suposed to!!!
I am disappointed but not without hope that a seventh book will bring my journey with Ayla to a more dignified and not so pathetic end….
Generally i feel as tho this book was a rushed project. It has untill now felt as though i’ve been reading a second or third draft of a novel in the process of being edited and although i’m not for a second going to say that it’s a horrid book i will say that it’s a piece of unfinished craftmanship i’ve been reading.
I LOVE caves. I loved the descriptions of the caves but it did get a bit much and a lot was repeated.
If she had followed the “plains” recipe and embellished the events along the way making the caves into an in-between i think i would have liked the tour better…
But it is an important part of the series mythology and the caves had to be there…
The mothers song was also a bit repetative.
during her calling i was expecting her (hoping rather…) that she would take a spirit-journey and see her son or a solution to the issues between Clan and the others, but instead she saw what every other animal on the planet knows insstinctively.

The series is kinda my “guilty pleasure”. A lot of my friends see it as an embellished Harlequinn series and it’s been described as “housewife-porn” by more than one of my friends but i can’t help being addicted… it’s been my “drug” from a very early age!!! This book was a bit like giving an alcoholic a flat non-alcoholic beer to staunch his thirst for more…

But i still LOVE the book for it’s connection to a fictional universe i’ve often daydreamed i could be a part of. I’ve spent weeks in the forests trying to build myself a cave-man-life (to no avail as people would come with rations and flashligths and other modern equipment, plus the fact i couldn’t make flint tools and had to use a modern knife…and matches… But hey… i tried…)
Whenever my life has been tough, i have returned to Ayla. not necessarily reading the books again but imagining how she would deal with the situation.
I could not have made it thru my teens in one piece without Auel’s fiction. I would not have thought of loosing my virgintiy as first rites and therefore feeling sooo special the next day if i hadn’t read those books. I’m pretty much the only one of my friends who had a peaceful and serene “first rites” as a result of thinking of it in terms of a ritual, not a random act of sex…

I have LIVED these books and been OBSESSED with Ayla’s story since i was 12. it taught me soo much about independence and trusting your heart! It has mede me tolerant towards people of different skintones, sexuality and beliefs and it has made me who I am!
I LOVE these people. I even had a long relationship with a man which started because he looked like what i’d imagined Jonde to look!!!!

But i will not, despite it’s repetative nature, give up on this novel.
I still LOVE the series and i probably always will. What I’m missing and thought this book was lacking was closure.
There is a lack of ending and a lack of resolving.
I miss finding a solution to where she came from and what her original name was. I miss finding a solution to the Clan/others conflicts and i miss her knowing what happened to her son.
as i say… it resembles a second draft gone straight to press…

I hope Auel, despite her ripe age of 75, will finish the series with a final book that takes us to the end of Ayla’s life in a more dignified manner. this book was below Ayla’s worth. we as readers and fans deserve a decent finale….

happy birthday to me

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Yesterday i turned 33.

i can not believe it…

33….

there is so much stupid in my past and so much responsibillity in my future…

i am happy… don’t get me wrong… i just don’t feel ready to be adult…

Guilty Pleasures

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I bet everybody has something they don’t nescesarily advertise but still gives them comfort. Well i’m gonna break the mold and confess my “sins”…

latelly i have been watching a show on MTV called Teen Moms. It started off as a spinoff from 16 and pregnant which follow pregnant teens in USA.

I was firstly fascinated and disgusted with the American sexual education system. i mean… half of these girls were totally clueless!

But anyway… 4 of these unlucky/witles girls have been followed thru the first 18 months of their childrens lives and i am absolutely hooked!

It is total trash-TV, but i am sat there really rooting for these girls. I want them to do good and i really want them to provide a good childhood for their children.

One girl gave up her child for adoption… which might be for the best as her family are total dope-heads with no direction in their lives what so ever. She still struggles tho but i think, despite feeling guilty about her choice, she has now given both herself and her daughter a fair chance in life. her baby is in a resourceful stable home and she herself can focus on getting out of the negative spiral that her own mother has disappeared into.

Another girl, Farrah, is struggling with her own parents who still want her to be their little innocent girl. Her boyfirend and father of her daughter died in a car crash while she was pregnant, so not only has she a pregnancy at 16 to deal with but also grief at her boyfriends death! and her mother completelly disregards the whole issue saying “he was no good for you” and stuff like that… I see that the family cares, but they just don’t seem to care that their granddaughter never will see her father… Whenever Farrah brings up the subject, her mother mentally turns her back on her. It makes me so sad! She needs support, not judgement.

It did make me laugh tho when she at one point went to a family planning clinic to get contraceptives. Just in case a god of a man came into her life… and her father when he discovered it made her out to be irresponsible and thoughtless. With that kind of attitude, i can fully understand how she got pregnant in the first place! What’s worse, dad, her taking responsibility, just in case, or her getting pregnant again because you have forbidden contraceptives…? Honestly… Puritan Americans make my head spin…

I did not loose anybody as such but the boy i had a crush on at 16 died when i was 18. Even tho he hardly spoke to me and my total “relationship” with him was sitting on a school bench outside the cafeteria waiting for him to walk past so i could have a short glimpse of him, i was seriously upset when he died.

He ment something to me. He was an important part of my teens and my emotional landscape. He shaped me and was a big part in forming the adult me.

I can not even begin to imagine what this Farrah girl is going thru!

Due to the series the girls have become rather famous and I would venture to guess that they do – unlike most teenage mothers – have a steady income as a result. My question is wether it is selling your soul to provide for your child?

I mean… we take part as viewers in their day. we se one of them beating the baby-father up and screaming obcenities, I want to go into the TV and give her a hug sometimes. She seems so lost and she obviously need more help and support than what anybody around her understand. There are issues with her maturity too but I honestly hope she’ll grow into herself and become more self confident. At the moment it seems everything she does goes wrong. I think the poor girl is actually depressed. It is common in teens and if there is an added issue of postnatal depression she hasn’t been able to work thru… well it’s not for me to say but she does need help!

Sometimes i think i should turn the TV off and stop watching the show, but at the same time, i have begun actually caring and worrying about these girls. I kinda feel responsible for them. I want them to do good. I want them to show other young girls how much a baby changes your life and i want more than anything for someone to help them!

The show is pure trash TV it’s social pornography and i feel guilty for being an addict. it’s embarrassing to watch these kinds of TV shows yet i feel like the series gives me something back. I care, i cry and i laugh with them as the stories and events unfold.

I have no idea why i started watching it. i usually never go for reality TV but something about those 4 girls struck a cord and now i can’t stop caring about them. Its as if they are my friends… which is completelly bizarre coz i have never met them and never will…

I was almost a bit disappointed when i googled the show and realized how big it actually is. They aren’t supposed to be famous. they are supposed to be young girls inside my TV and i’m supposed to care in a way i can’t care about a celebrity.

I don’t know.

In any case.

I’m addicted to the show… it’s not cool and it’s not trendy but i have to keep watching now. Just to make sure they do allright…

How a New Food Sprinkle Convinces the Brain to Stop Over-Eating | How Life Works

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well well
In the time it has taken me to blog i have had a horrid bronchitis with high fever.
Thank god that my mother had time to get my girl at nursery and bring me back to my childhood home. i was ill… properly couldn’t breathe and felt like my bones had all truned to jelly.
but i got my antibiotics and i’m more or less back on track.
at least i’m back at work…
I just need a bit more oxygen and we’re good to go…

as to the rest of my life.
well… i’m still trying to be creative but finding the day a bit short…. i’m still writing my novel. the characters are chewing their way thru the story in my head but i haven’t had time to type their shenanigans.
i swear those teens in that story have taken on a life of their own…. if i had a wish it would be that i could turn off my brain and mentally sleep with my laptop on and my characters flowing out thru my fingers. i wouldn’t mind editing out the uninteresting things afterwards….

How a New Food Sprinkle Convinces the Brain to Stop Over-Eating | How Life Works.

 

You have GOT to be joking right?

Now there’s a shocker

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Jonathan Knight Is Gay: New Kids On The Block Star Comes Out.

Bless you Jon for not making a fuss.

I was a huge fan back in my green youth. But even at the age of 12 i somehow knew Jonathan Knight was “off limits”. But then at that age i couldn’t give a red monkeys bottom if either of those guys were into whatever… you name it… elephant-poo, shoes, s&m… you name it it would have been forgiven… at the age of 12 i believed wholeheartedly that the sun shone out of their bottoms and i truly believed that every one of those boys would be able to walk on air… never mind water…

To be honest tho… i was more inclined to suspect his brother of playing it a bit too much up for the girls but i’m not gonna make a thing of it.

there is nothing even close to being shocking or surprising about this but for some reason the newspapers think it’s important.

Jonathan, If you happen to read this, like ever… please know… You still rock!

Honestly? New Kids On The Block were such a HUGE part of my adolescence, And i have a million fond memories from their music, the giddy feeling i had and remembering all the posters i had all over my room. I went straight from puppies and horses and dreams of becoming a circus-princess to plastering my entire room in New Kids…They were seriously EVERYWHERE!

i kept all the magazine clippings until i was 20 and i still have the music on CD in case of a proper down-in-the-dumps-day. the music? quite frankly (in hindsight and with an evolved taste…) it’s rubbish… but back then it was the big IT and it cheers me up simply by reminding me of a much much simpler time when life was without finance, relationships and cooking.

so basically… i don’t care if  penguins turn you on… You are still my teen-hero and pinup!

 

Moved from Blogspot

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angels
This week i have visitors in my life.
These particular angels will stay with me untill Saturday when they are supposed to move on to 3 of my friends and bring them some happiness.
The only problem is that my friends are all a bunch of cynics who laughs at the idea of lighting a candle and asking for help from these beings of light.
So when they are finished with my life, i will send them on to the one other person i know who believes.
And she is allready the most enthusiastc-fantastic person i know!
but…
I think they do something. Not a huge degree of change but some…
I won’t say what i’ve asked for but i can feel then pulling at me in the right directions.
the cat senses it too. he’s way more patient than usual and he’s cuddly yet not his clingy self. he seems somehow more content.
I don’t know… It may be just me.
But i seem calmer too. i don’t feel as stressed and yesterday on the bus i actually felt happy. not just glad to be going home and seeing my beautiful girl, but truly blissful and deeply content. I was so surprised i started looking for what made me feel so good and i couldn’t put my finger on it. although i was dog-tired form a long day at work, the happiness kinda stuck and was just there. i thought it might be the late-winter light that hints of spring but i don’t like spring all that much as it creates stupid mounts of havoc with my immune system. I do love the first flowers tho…
I didn’t even mind climbing into my car thru the rear hatch coz the frost had glued all the doors stuck. Noramlly i’d swear at the stupid car for being so stupidly idiotic, making me late and inconvenient… but yesterday i was happy that the fall of snow was a dry-drift that would fly off as i set the wipers in motion rather than heavy wet stuff that i would have to climb back out wioth the brush again to scrape and brush off.
i don’t know why this feeling seems wrong. Nothing seems to faze me this week. It’s like i’m impervious to stress and negativity….
So… I’ve decided to use these angels who are visiting me as a springboard into a calmer and more harmonic self.
so what if the weather is foul or there is lots to do at work.
I will from now on try my best at playing the Pollyanna-game!
Does anybody else remember her? in the books she had a game of trying to find something positive in every single situation.
I ahve allready written my wishes for the angels but i hope this feeling remains.
Lagt inn av sammensurimshuset kl. 02:31 0 kommentarer
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tirsdag 18. januar 2011
feverchild
Sometimes i wish i could take certain burdens for my daughter.
At the moment she is sat on the sofa with a grayish hue to her face and a body full of the flu. she’s been suffering since friday but didn’t get a fever untill saturday and although her morale and mood is good she is still suffering with a blocked nose and no apetite… poor tyke.
I was ill more or less constantly as a child and i had a steady stream of bronchitis from the age of 5 ish. thankfully my daughter has so far had a teflon coated health so i’m hoping she won’t have the constant fevers i remember form my childhood. i am supplying a steady stream of drinks, ice lollies and potatocrisps to at least keep her hydrated. the rest is up to mother nature.
Tomorrow, if the fever don’t break tonight, we’ll be heading for the doctors.
i don’t like the idea of dragging her outside in the wintercold while she has a fever but by tomorrow her fever has lasted for so long i’d like to eliminate any infections beyond the ordinary flu-virus…
Lagt inn av sammensurimshuset kl. 01:47 0 kommentarer

The wonderful thing about 30…

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One of my friends turns 30 today and thus i feel it is appropriate to muse a bit on the subject…

30 is a wonderful age. i had a bit of a crisis on the wole changing decade thing… and now it kinda freaks me out that i’ll be 33 in March… and i will tell you why:
this is sooo totally irrational but here goes…
When i was 17 there was a tarot-booth in Trondheim during a festival or some such event.. my friend wanted to try so we were offered a two for one prize and my friend said she’d pay so i went along. and after my friend had been told about a lightning bright future, the “gypsy” woman spoke and spoke and spoke loads…,
when it was my turn, she didn’t speak at all, which kinda freaked me out.
 
then when all the cards were dealt she said (my own comments on her predictions in blue…):
 
“you will face great grief and hardship. I see there will be many children but also great loss (I have miscarried at least 2 times and had an ectopic pregnancy..)
You will not find peace in your work, you have a golden heart which people will recognize and take advantage of (Yup… i’m too nice…hehe)
she said something about money and love which was either not interesting at the time or interpreted to mean a guy i had a crush on at the time… so i don’t remember….
and…
Then she dealt some new cards in a section of the “sun” she had laid out for me and she looked really worried… But then she said:
I’m not sure if i should tell you this but i do not see your future beyond your mid 30’ies. there is death at the age of 34 and the cards after that age are nondescript and cloudy. All i I will say, your journey ends when you are 34.”
 
so i’m kinda freaked out over approaching 34…
friends of mine who know tarots are shocked that she would say this to me as serious tarot readers should never predict actual death. they are usually allowed to say there will be a change, but they should not predict death.
A friend of mine who was learning palmistry did a follow up a bit later and she said signs are that i should have 7 or one child. (4 down…)
and that something happens in my early adulthood coz there is a serious break in my lifeline, and my lifeline is generally weak.
So being a grown-up in my 30’ies kinda isn’t where i wanna be…